To attempt to describe the average twelve- to fourteen-year-old is a complex and difficult undertaking. This is an age of rapid and profound growth. Physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual developments are all taking place in these young teens. While peers are a very strong influence at this age, adults continue to be important in the lives of young teens. This is particularly true when they are troubled, fearful, or unsure of situations in which they find themselves. Because twelve- to fourteen-year-olds are more able to think abstractly than in previous years, they now have the capacity for critical reflection on their experiences and how they can find God in their lives. Faith traditions and moral guidance can offer this age group the structure and security they need during this turbulent time.

Physical Characteristics

• Young teens are entering or about to enter puberty.
• Physical growth can vary greatly from child to child.
• Change can seem to happen overnight.

Cognitive/Learning Skills

• Abstract reasoning is more developed.
• Capacity for critical reflection is developing.
• Attention span has increased.
• There is great diversity of ability in this age group as new skills develop.

Relationships

• Peer influence is very strong.
• Respect for parents and other adults is still retained.
• It is very important that young teens are accepted for the unique persons they are.

Religious Growth

Young Teens:

• have increased conscience formation.
• seek freedom, but still need structure.
• challenge and question beliefs and norms of the community.
• are able to be more reflective of themselves and their experiences.
• place importance on faith tradition as an anchor and support when everything else is in flux.
• need their questions welcomed and need to be encouraged in their self-expression.

Growing as Disciples

Young people at this age are at a critical time in their spiritual development. Each young teen needs to be given the opportunity to discover his or her own unique gifts and their vocational call by God. The traditions and teachings of the Church can be an anchor in a world that is otherwise changing at a fast rate. Parents play a vital role in the spiritual growth of their young teens. Parents can guide their adolescents in discerning God’s call of discipleship by responding in a positive and affirming manner.

We asked a group of junior high students what they would like a parent to know about them. Here’s what they said:

I Wish You Would…

• help me see my unique self.
• let me ask questions that may make you feel a little uncomfortable.
• understand that I sometimes challenge authority because I have to assert my own ideas and try them out.
• be there to talk to when I need a trusted adult.
• give me opportunities to talk about my friendships.
• demonstrate to me that my ideas matter.
• give me time to have fun with my friends.